currently 8:39 PM 29/11/2005

am currently in Vancouver

sent an email to Johnmcmurt@aol.com about mindcontrol

I had previously formed the opinion that the mindcontrol was partly automated; I had used the phrase 'Eliza program' to describe their methods
because they appeared to be partly scripted, or their reactions were (semi?)automatically generated responses to my thoughts

Johnmcmurt@aol.com replied by email that

>Most victims think that harassment is live all the time, but I think
>that is often not the case and there are automation methods.

the phrase 'automation methods' is like a religious revelation because it is exactly what has been happening to me; therefore
the mind control is real; it would be worse in the UK than here in Canada, because MI5 have more staff/resources in the UK

at this point the voices have started saying 'that's what we were afraid of' in reference to JMM's email mention of automation;
that is why they did not want me to read that email; because I would change my mind about going back to UK

PHONE: MI5 have been interfering with my phone communications, from my hotel rooms, and from payphones; when I phone American Airlines,
there is a 'click' and the phonecall is redirected to some other party who sounds useless and wastes time so as to do nothing
and merely annoy me; the same with FEDEX UK, called them, there was a 'click' and the call was redirected to people who merely timewasted;
so I have been unable to recover the MEMSTICK with computer files from my mother's home
and FEDEX UK cannot progress anything because the person who answers merely timewastes;

... the MI5 voice says 'we cannot kill you, we do not kill harmless schizophrenics, we can only torture you, you can write that in your weblog'

THERE IS HOPE, AND IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR ME IN CANADA, BECAUSE MI5 HAVE FEWER RESOURCES THERE; AIM TO STAY IN CANADA;

*** THE VOICES LIE, THEY DEMAND TRUST AND THEN BETRAY THE TRUST; IGNORE WHAT THEY SAY, AND CONSIDER MY BEST INTERESTS ONLY; DO NOT TRUST THEM
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further notes written 22:36 12/12/2005

flew American Airlines 24/11/2005 Heathrow -> LAX, voices throughout flight; I thought microwaves wouldn't work on aircraft because of
radio noise, and microwaves/whatever would be unsafe on plane; voices told me I was going to die imminently of a heart attack;
voices told me to go to back and talk to stewardess, which I did; then voices told me to ask for physician, two of them arrived,
one said he was a doctor at "university college in los angeles";

tried to phone my mother; was unable to reach her; they gave me water and orange juice and voices said one was poison, did I want to die,
then drink the poison; plane landed, deplaned and was met by several police, the "uc" doctor talked on my behalf, said I was ok but
blood sugar (anxiety?) police said this was nothing, they'd been expecting to restrain someone, I was just very scared; they let me
go through, I thought something terrible had happened in the UK, phoned my mother, she said everything was okay; I thought they were
all talking about me at the airport because of what had happened, but they weren't;

there was one instance of 'visual hallucination' on the plane, a blotch on paper or cloth magically disappeared or reinstated into some other form;
that is the only visual hallucination I have ever had.

at airport had constricting throat, sought help of police, several arrived, they were thinking of sectioning me to LA hospital,
but they let me take onward flight to Vancouver; on that flight there were some voices but mild;
arrived Vancouver, got checked by customs, they thought I had MI problem but let me through;

in vancouver, I was expecting them to leave me alone, but they followed while I was in the cab, they were there when I was at downtown hotel
(St Regis?); they followed me around everywhere, to other hotels - holiday inn on broadway where they made my heart race again;
I phoned my mother and Marylka, voices told me I was talking to other people and not to them; could not recognise mother's voice
or Marylka's clearly enough; also phoned from phonebox, could not recognise mother's voice from there either;

I was intending to stay in Canada until Christmas with option on permanently, so I bought a VAIO computer there;
asked mother to send memstick with files for the computer I had bought; she said she couldn't or wouldn't; phoned AA, there was a 'click'
which the voices told me was to their person instead of AA, their person wasted time and wouldn't do anything; same happened
when I called UK FEDEX, click then went through to their person, who wasted time and wouldn't do anything;

spent one night at airport Holiday Inn; had a bad anxiety attack and ran through the corridor to the lifts and thought I was going to die;
police and mental health came to hospital, talked to me and I went to Richmond Hospital for one night voluntarily; voices were very quiet
while I was in the hospital; perhaps I should have stayed there a few more days;

walked along Broadway to Main street, voices were talking to me all the time; furthest point was Starbucks on Main street, they were trying
to get me to catch a bus instead of walking back; I was worried that I would panic on the bus so I walked instead; voices were changing
my behaviour (physical movements and method of walking), grabbing my attention so I walked past Broadway without realising, and tone of speech;

because I couldn't recognise mother/marylka on the phone, I went home rapidly, couldn't go AA so went Air Canada 30/11/2005;
some voices on return flight but quite mild;
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